I am sitting here in our otherwise uninhabited resort, very burnt. James is a nice shade of tan and sipping hot tea on the hot beach. We escaped the hordes of people in Phuket seeking sun and sex and now find ourselves on a vast, empty beach (just us and the translucent sand crabs) with jungle on either side. Since it’s technically monsoon season, the hotels are nearly empty, the rates are cheap, and the weather is beautiful. There are nightly thunderstorms, but sandbags line the shore to protect us. And the lightening looks like the laser light show you see at Disneyland, so of course it can’t be real.

One the way up, we weren’t sure whether we should disembark at Lam Kaen, a few miles south of the main town, or Khao Lak, where we wouldn’t have to take a motorcycle to our chosen lodging: Poseiden Bungalows. Moreover, we hadn’t been able to get in touch with them. It wasn’t until we finally ended up in a pricey minibus that we discovered that it was closed. But there was a silver lining: we saw a baby elephant or two along the way. I named him Bingo. He was a big show-off that one. The minivan driver graciously brought us to one fantastically expensive resort, and then this one (Khao Lak Sunset Resort): for $40 a night, we have elephant-shaped towels, a beach and pool to ourselves, and a balcany with beautiful sunsets. Breakfast included.

The food here is intended for Germans with a healthy appetite and distrust of all things local. Our breakfast came complete with a basket of meats which I refused. We spent most of our time within sight of the hotel—three meals and counting—bouncing between the chest-height waves and the shaded lawn chairs. The ocean here is about 80 degrees, almost too hot to be refreshing. But with plenty of dangerous boulders and washed up coral, we were easily amused.

Tomorrow, we head to the not-so-isolated Ko Pha Ngan, an island of hippies and snorkelers I wanted to go to James Bond Island but James made some some strong arguments for why we should not go somewhere just because I saw it on a postcard in the grocery store. It could take us all day and night, but I’ll keep you posted.